Why Men Were Put On This Earth To Drive Women Crazy
Sometimes, I wish I were a lesbian. Or, even better, assexual. Then I wouldn’t have to deal with this nonsense at all.
I was having a conversation with one of my Best Girls about relationships (because that’s what chicks do when they get together – that and try and stop each other from going stark, raving mad from the sheer insanity that is the dating world). She made the point that some people find relationships – or getting into relationships – really easy. Other people do not. We both fall into the ‘do not’ category.
I struggle to determine exactly why it should be so difficult to me: I’m a cute, young thing with brains and a great sense of humour. Surely, some man out there would actually seek to step up to the plate and try and take me off the market? Nope. Plenty of them try to get into my pants but none of them actually seek me out because I’m nice company or they’d like to get to know me better or any of the million other things one human being would like to acquaint themselves with another human being.
What doesn’t help is how perplexing men act. Take the potential romantic interest I alluded to in the last post. Two weeks ago, I asked him out for a drink. He accepted. We then spend almost 7 hours chatting. I’d call that a successful date; wouldn’t you? And yet, he has made no effort to contact me since. We have spoken a couple of times since then but I’ve initiated all the contact… he hasn’t bothered to pursue me at all or show in any way that he would actively go out of his way to meet me again.
Now, to my mind that sends a fairly clear statement: he’s just not that in to me. And yet, why would you spend 7 hours with anyone unless you dug them a little? If he really isn’t that into me, why not just make your excuses after the first hour? Why stay for another six and buy me dinner?
I DON’T GET IT.
I wish I could tell you something inspiring and encouraging, but honestly, I’ve been wishing I was a lesbian or asexual as well.
And I’m married!!!
Men are just….
I don’t know.
Love sucks.
Dating sucks.
I hate when they don’t call. And it’s ten times worse when they made you think that things went well with the date.
I hate when you feel like there’s a major connection. You think there’s something special there and then they don’t call.
The brief joys and thrills of love. Are they really worth the heartache?
I think 7 hours does amount to somthing. Men are warped … all of them. Hence why I am not dating at the moment. I need time to fix me and then I can attempt to find a mate until then.. YAWN.
I have heard that women are even more difficult to get into a relationship with than men. That commitment in the lesbian world is just as hard to come by, if not harder. But I get your gist.
You are right. It is easier for some to fall into relationships. I don’t know why it is.
My sister and I were musing the other day about what it is that men like about us (ie my sister and me specifically). Becasue we are nothing special, per se, but have had an overwhelming share of sincere interest from all sorts of men. We are not particularly beautiful or successful, etc. We concluded that it might be that we have no check-list. No boxes to fill. But even this isn’t really that true. I have my fair share of expectations.
I dunno!
In a similar conversation, LB said maybe it was my ‘gait’. Flattered. NOT! Makes me sound like an effing horse!
As I have said before, I understand what it is you are looking for and why. A relationship can be a beautiful thing. They can be hard on us, but I’ll take the rough with the smooth over nothing at all. We are built to want the other.
If only there was a ‘sincerity scan’ that we could run over prospectives before we even breath a word to them.
This past Thursday I had a sort of business coffee with someone and ended up speaking with her for three hours about all sorts of random things none related to the actual business matter. Zero sexual attraction (being, in part, that I’m married). Some people just like talking.
Dina: Not sure if it’s worth it as this stage :s
K: Glad you got a plan!
Hen: Now that would be a very handy innovation..
Chris: Yes, but I wasn’t on a business lunch. If I was on a business lunch, I wouldn’t read anything into talking for hours (particularly if the other person is married). Circumstances are everything: we’d met offline from a dating site to meet each other… I don’t think anyone would expect a girl not to get the same idea under those circumstances.
Im in a long term relationship and still don’t understand them. I don’t understand women either. When it comes romance we’re all mad. Mad I tell you. Mad!
Love never makes sense. If it did, there would have been one book written a few thousand years ago and we would just all read that when we turned 13 so we would know what to do. Your date is probably following some advice he read in a men’s magazine.
At least men have some kind of interest in you, even if it’s just to get into your pants? I can count the number of guys interested in me in ANY respect on no hands! They’re not interested in me for looks, nor are they interested in me for a companion. I’ve never been asked on a date, never looked at with interest, and never really considered for anything.
One guy loved me, but it was a lie. The other loved who HE was when with me, which is plainly selfish. And the others? They would never consider me. Not for a second. Even the guys who like me a whole lot – just not in that way.
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i think 7 hours and no further contact means you’re interesting at a platonic level at best (or they were too polite/cowardly to excuse themselves and were totally bored at worst)…if there’s nothing sexual/partner material there they are just too lazy to make an effort really because they could be spending that time on someone who is partner material!! so frustrating…especially if you just want new friends! on the flip side maybe they could sense you just weren’t that into them…and so they’d prefer to make effort on some other chick who will dote on and admire them. Strangely enough I’ve always had a pretty good understanding of men, women on the other hand, FAR MORE COMPLEX! i’m learning though…slowly!
There’s always the nunnery to consider!